Never Find Another
by degrassichick
Summary: Blair Waldorf was marrying Nate Archibald, and that was the way it should be. Her only problem was Chuck Bass, the best friend. BC OneShot


**Hey readers!**

**Okay, so over the past few months I have developed a new obsession, and it's entitled Gossip Girl. I have read the books, but the TV series, I have to say (don't shoot me!), is much better in my opinion. Haha**

**And I have grown a major obsession with Blair & Chuck, so I had to write this! So, it's based off of the television version, not the books.**

**Enjoy!**

**-**

**R&R and please, no flames:)**

**-**

**XO,**

**DC :)**

**-**

**PS: To all the readers who also read my Life with Derek fan fictions, the podcast for Out of the Blue has officially been posted!...but, a lot of you guys probably already know that…lol (I personally was EXTREMELY excited, it was an amazing Christmas present! Haha). And, I promise to have Donnie & the Martster updated soon!!!**

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_**Never Find Another**_

**-**

**C**

**-**

One picture.

Chuck Bass had _one_ picture of them together. One, and only one.

They had been messing around in his bedroom one day during their senior year of high school. She had stood up from his bed and snagged his Sony Cybershot from the glass table it was sitting on, the same glass table that held his LG LCD 32" television. She had whipped around to face him and pounced down on the bed, immediately turning the camera to him.

"Blair, what are you doing?" he had asked, eyeing her coyly and laughing.

"Come on, I know there's a supermodel _somewhere_ deep down inside of you. Embrace it." She winked at him and pressed down on the top button, a flash illuminating his face.

Chuck blinked a few times, before snagging the camera out of the hands of his…he wasn't quite sure _what_ to call Blair. She wasn't his girlfriend. She was his _best friend_'s girlfriend. Still. She wasn't his mistress, that just sounded perverted. The only true word to describe her would be…well, _Blair_.

He turned the camera on her and grinned evilly.

Blair shook her head at him, her lips pursed and her big eyes soft. "The only way you're getting a picture of me, Bass, is if you're in it with me."

He waggled his eyebrows, moving the camera away. "Done." He noted before Blair snagged the camera out of his hands once more. She held out at arm's length, so that it was planted in the middle of them. She pressed her cheek up against him, dropped her mouth open into a large, gaping smile, and took the picture.

The picture was _still_ in his room. It was lying in his nightstand, under a bunch of magazines and condom packets. No one would ever know about that picture. No one except for Chuck and Blair, that is.

"Unbelievable." She had said. "Chuck Bass is _smiling _in a picture." She held the camera out to Chuck, as if he needed proof of her discovery.

But, all he could focus on was Blair, with her large, goofy smile, and her wide, laughing eyes. He had _never_ seen her photograph that happy, not once. Definitely not in the millions upon _millions_ of photos she and Nate had taken together. That had to count for something, right?

Chuck ran the pad of his thumb down the length of the picture from where he sat on his bed in his apartment in Boston.

It didn't take much longer after graduation and Nate giving Blair a promise ring for Chuck to feel the need to get as far away from New York while managing to stay on the East Coast as possible. He couldn't go to California, it wasn't his scene. And so, he chose Boston.

A copy of the New York Times sat beside him on the bed, and he already knew what it entailed. On the _front cover_, no less.  
_"Daughter of Acclaimed Fashion Designer to Wed"_...he nearly dropped the newspaper when he first saw it in his locked up mailbox, but it didn't surprise him in the slightest bit.

Blair Waldorf was marrying Nathaniel Archibald. Why the hell wouldn't she be?

Nate hadn't called him. He had called his oldest friend to tell him about his engagement. No, he had waited for him and the rest of the country to read about it on the front cover of the Times.

He had hated Nate since the wedding of their sophomore year. The wedding where he saw his best friend and his best friend's _girlfriend's_ best friend doing things that they shouldn't have been doing. He would never understand why Nate had done that to Blair, except for the possible fact that Nate might just be in love with Serena, and not the girl he had been with since kindergarten. But regardless, how could _anyone_ do that to Blair?

But, he wasn't one to talk. It would be far too much "pot calling the kettle black", for he and his best friend's girlfriend had their own behind-closed-doors secrets. Or they used to, at least.

The day that Blair got the promise ring from Nate, she instantly ended things with Chuck.

"I have a reputation to uphold, Chuck." Was what she had said to him. Never had seven words stung him so badly.

And that was the end of that.

Five years later, and she had stayed true to her vow. Never once, had she called or spoken a word to Chuck. And never once, had Chuck felt so entirely…_crushed_.

-

**B**

**-**

"Blair, you look incredible." Jennifer Humphrey told Blair Waldorf, from where she sat on her plush bed in her Upper East Side apartment.

Blair stood before her, dressed in a glamorous wedding gown from Vera Wang. Her dark locks were hanging down her back, a tiara and veil on top of her head. She smiled approvingly. "Thanks, little Humphrey."

"Can't say that forever, Blair." Jennifer (as she was now referred to) laughed. "I'm 22."

"Nate's going to die when he sees you." Serena murmured, a distant tone to her voice.

"That is the plan." Blair joked, turning to face her friends.

"Are you ready for tomorrow?" Jenny asked, an excited smile on her face.

Blair nodded. "Yes, of course." She said. "I've been dreaming of marrying Nate since I was in onesies, I've never been surer or readier for anything in my entire life."

All she could hope for was that what she had just said was believable to her friends. Because at that moment, where she was standing in a wedding gown that she would be wearing to marry Nathaniel Archibald, an image of a much different boy was flashing through Blair's head. A boy with a smug smile, and big, brown eyes, dark hair and insanely kissable lips.

She didn't know anything about Chuck Bass's whereabouts, only that he was living in Boston, and had yet to make a return to New York ever since their high school graduation.

"Oh, I have to go." Jenny said quickly, glancing at her Sidekick and standing up from the bed. "Erik's having a hell of a time at the tux shop, I have to go see what's the problem." She said with a laugh. "I'll see you bright and early tomorrow, guys!" she said cheerfully, blowing them air kisses before hurrying out of her bedroom. Blair heard the door to her apartment open and close within a matter of moments.

"So, is it weird for you?" Blair asked with a laugh.

Serena, instantly picking up on what her best friend was entailing, laughed slightly. "That my ex-boyfriend's sister and brother have been dating since their freshman year of high school, or that my ex-boyfriend's father and my mother are married? Any way you put it, it's entirely Jerry Springer."

Blair laughed, sitting at the very end of her bed, as to not wrinkle her gown. "But, you can't deny it, Rufus and Lily are adorable."

Serena laughed, nodding her head. "That they are. It has to be fate that they're together, like they were destined for each other."

Blair nodded her head. "Like Nate and I."

Serena nodded slowly. "Y-yeah…like you and Nate."

Blair eyed her best friend curiously. "Are you okay, S?"

She nodded quickly, laughing. "Of course, B. Why wouldn't I be?"

Blair shrugged it off.

Serena sighed, standing up from the chair she was sitting in. "I have to get going. I promised my mom I would pick her up this photo frame that she was freaking out about from Tiffany." She rolled her eyes playfully. "So, I'll see you tomorrow morning. K?"

Blair laughed, nodding. "K, love you S!"

"Love you, B!" she called back cheerfully. "Call you tonight!" she said, making her way out of Blair's bedroom and into the depths of her apartment.

She appeared back in Blair's room not even three seconds later.

"Yes?" Blair asked, laughing.

Serena laughed along with her friend. "I was just thinking…you know that gold necklace that you got in high school from Tiffany?" Blair's heart froze, and she nodded her head rigidly. "It would look amazing with that dress." Serena finished, before blowing Blair a kiss and hurrying out of the bedroom.

Blair listened as her door clicked shut before she pursed her lips and stood up from her bed. She knew damn well which necklace Serena was talking about, and she knew exactly where it was.

She quickly slipped out of her dress, and draped it over her chaise, now standing in her bedroom alone in a strapless bustier and a pair of matching underwear. She made her way across the polished teak flooring in her bedroom before she stood in front of her closet, sliding open the door and reaching up to the top shelf, pawing her hands around until she felt them touch a slick box.

She pulled down the Jimmy Choo shoebox and sat it down on her bed, before she sat down beside it. The top of the box said "CHUCK BASS WAS HERE!" in large, black Sharpie (his doing, Blair had more class).

She lifted the top of the box and was bombarded with letters addressed to Chuck Bass on 1509 Beaker St., Apartment 15, in Boston, Massachusetts, letters that she never sent.

They were letters telling him that she missed him, and still cared about him. Letters telling him that maybe she had made a mistake, that maybe she wouldn't mind moving to Massachusetts, that maybe _Nate_ wasn't the one for her. But, deep down inside, she knew she couldn't send him the letters.

Blair Waldorf was marrying Nate Archibald, it was practically set in stone, and it was the way it should be. Her only problem was Chuck Bass, the best friend. If Chuck could get out of her head for more than half a day, maybe everything would work out the way it was supposed to.

She pulled a letter up from the box, and a letter that had been sitting against the side of the box tipped over against it, a letter with the name Blair scribbled on it in very familiar handwriting. _Chuck_'s handwriting.

She eyed it curiously, before plucking it up and gingerly opening the envelope.

She pulled the crisp, unopened letter out of the envelope and unfolded it.

"Blair," she began to read it aloud:

_The fact that I'm writing you this letter possibly makes me the shittiest best friend in the history of shitty best friends, but at this point, well, I really don't give a (you guessed it) shit. You can't argue it for a second that this past year you have had more fun with me than you ever had with Nate. I'm not the only one that did stealing between the two of us, Waldorf. I know I stole your virginity, and you know you stole my heart, just like that annoying, sappy Dashboard Confessional song that you kept singing when we were lying in bed over spring break this year._

_I __**love**__ you, Blair. And I know that you think that being with Nate for the rest of your Upper East Side, pristine life is the way it's supposed to be, I _know_ that. _

_But what do __**you **__want, Blair Waldorf?_

_Because, I know what I want. And I'm leaving for Boston in the morning, while what I want will be here, in Manhattan. So, maybe I'll find a knockoff, the next best thing. Which is quite admirable of me, I must say. Because, you know that Chuck Bass never settles for less than the best. Just like someone else I know quite well. _

_Don't keep me waiting for too long._

_Always,_

"Chuck Bass." She finished, a tear slipping down her cheek. She dropped the letter to her bed and held a hand over her mouth.

Chuck Bass, for the first time in his life, had told a girl that he loved her. And it only took her five years to know he had said it to _her_. She knew this was from their senior year of high school, from the night of their graduation, in fact. The date was on the top of the letter.

_6-2-2009_

_9:25 PM_

That had been when she had told him it was over, when she had told him that Nate was the one she wanted.

And now more than ever, she realized that she had never regretted a thing she had said to someone so much as she regretted what she said to Chuck on grad night.

And how twisted was that?

-

**C**

**-**

Chuck had written Blair a letter.

He had written it to her on the night of their graduation. She had told him it was over at the grad party that she was holding at her penthouse. He had pulled her into her bedroom, kissing her endlessly before they toppled onto her bed. She had broken away from him and told him that what was happening between them…couldn't happen.

She told him about Nate and the promise ring before she had left him in her bedroom, off to join Nate.

He had ripped a piece of paper out of one of her notebooks and poured out the entirety of his feelings into that single letter. He slipped it into an envelope, written her name on it, and slid it into the side of "his" shoebox, that contained nothing more than the box holding the necklace he had given to her for her birthday.

He had expected her to find him at the airport the next morning, to throw herself into his arms and kiss him endlessly.

But that didn't happen.

If she ever even _found_ the letter, she hadn't cared enough to even call. And he wanted to believe that Blair wasn't _that_ heartless.

Of course, she _was_ Blair Waldorf, after all.

It was raining on that Sunday. The day that Blair Waldorf was to be marrying Nathaniel Archibald, and it was _raining._

In Boston, at least.

He was drawn out of his stupor of flipping through television channels on his couch, when his doorbell rang.

Standing up from the couch, he made his way to the door and swung it open.

His eyes widened, and his mouth opened out of shock.

Standing in front of him, in a drenched wedding gown and smeared mascara, was Blair Waldorf.

-

**B**

**-**

"I love you and all, B, but you look like Hell." Serena noted with a laugh as she and Blair stood in the dressing room of the Palace Hotel.

"Thank you, so much." Blair muttered bitterly. "I barely got any sleep last night. And I have the bags under my eyes to prove it."

"Why?" Serena asked nervously, sitting down on the couch and patting the spot beside her, for Blair to sit down.

Blair sighed and sat down beside her, smoothing down her gown. "I don't think I can marry Nate, S."

Serena's body froze. "What?"

"I can't do it." She said with a sigh.

"But there has to be a reason, Blair." Serena said gingerly.

Blair nodded her head slowly, a tear escaping down her cheek, no matter how much she demanded that it didn't. "Chuck."

Serena turned her head to face her. "Chuck _Bass_?"

"Do we know another Chuck?" Blair asked.

"Blair…what does Chuck have to do with anything?" Serena asked.

Blair quickly grabbed her Chanel clutch from where it sat on an end table and pulled out the envelope containing Chuck's letter, she handed it to Serena. "_This_."

Serena eyed her best friend curiously before she opened up the envelope and read the letter, her eyes widening more and more before she got to the end of it. "Oh my God, Blair."

Blair nodded her head. "Yeah. I found it last night."

"And because of this letter, you're not marrying Nate?" Serena asked, obviously still confused. She handed the letter back to Blair, who tucked it back into her bag.

"The feelings that he wrote in that letter," Blair started. "They're not one-sided, S."

"Wow." Serena murmured. "How do you think Nate's going to take it?"

Blair lifted one shoulder into a shrug. "Probably better than I expect."

Serena sent her a confused expression, but an almost hopeful look twinkled in her eyes. "Why…?"

Blair laughed slightly, cutting her friend off. "I'm not blind…Nate's been acting weird ever since he proposed, almost as if he regretted popping the question to me."

Serena shook her head. "Blair, that can't possibly be true-"

"He still loves you, S." Blair cut her off once more. "I know he does. And I know that _those_ feelings aren't exactly unrequited either."

Serena shook her head, almost as if getting caught doing something she shouldn't have been doing. "Blair, I'm sorry…"

"Don't be." Blair murmured.

"So, what happens next?" Serena asked, staring off to the other side of the dressing room, almost as if not capable of making eye contact with Blair.

"Next, I go find Nate and tell him….and then I find out how the hell I'm going to get to Boston."

Serena's eyes widened as she whipped her head to face Blair, now completely _capable_ of making eye contact with her. "You're going to _Boston_?"

Blair nodded. "I have to. I made a huge mistake, S. And I need to fix it, ASAP." She laughed, before standing up from the couch and turning to face her best friend, who was standing up as well.

Serena stood, pulling her best friend into a tight hug. "I love you, B." she murmured into her hair.

"Love you too." Blair said with a small smile playing at her lips before she turned and made her way out of the dressing room, she paused at the door, turning to face Serena once more. "Wish me luck."

"Good luck on dumping your fiancé." Serena said helpfully, laughing, before sinking back down to the couch, breathing out a sigh of relief.

-

Blair made her way towards the dressing room a few doors down from her own. She tapped on it, sucking in a nervous breath, but standing firmly on the ground, poised and confident. "Nate? It's Blair."

"You know its bad luck to see the bride before the wedding, don't you?" Nate called out from the other end, laughter to his voice.

"It's important." Blair responded.

_Important as in, the calling off of our wedding._

The door opened up without another word.

She stepped inside, as Nate's best man, one of his friends from Dartmouth, made his way out of the room.

"Blair," Nate murmured as he spotted her in her gown. "You look…amazing."

She smiled softly. "Can we sit down?"

They sat side-by-side on the couch so similar to the one in her own dressing room.

"What's up?" Nate asked.

Blair sucked in a deep sigh. "I can't marry you, Nate."

There. She said it.

Nate remained silent for a few moments, as if letting the words sink into him, before he finally spoke. "What?"

She let out a shaky breath. "I slept with Chuck back in high school." She said quickly.

"Yeah, I know." Nate said. "You told me that a few years ago." His voice held a disapproving tone.

"I didn't really realize it much until now, but I had feelings for him back then…and I think I still do."

Nate sucked in a deep breath. "You think or you know?"

Blair gulped. "I know."

"But, we were supposed to get married, Blair. We were supposed to get married and have kids and-"

"Live that cookie-cutter lifestyle that our parents strive for us to have." Blair cut him off. "But that's just it, it's as if we are doing this just because our _parents_ want us to. You're not supposed to get married because it's what you're parents expect you to do. This isn't the middle ages. And I know that I don't want my mom's life, and I _know_ you don't want your dad's life." She could tell by the look on Nate's face that he agreed with her. "I know that you want adventure in your life, you need to be with someone who is quirky and lively and fun and will race you around Central Park without complaining of her feet hurting. And I need to be-"

"With Chuck." Nate finished, staring down at the flooring.

"I'm sorry, Nate."

"I expected it." He said softly, almost as if talking more to himself than to Blair. "I always expected it."

"This isn't the part where you start thrashing around the room, hurling things off of tables and kicking a lot, is it?" she asked, almost playfully.

Nate, despite the situation, let out half of a laugh, almost more like a scoff. "No."

"Are you okay?" she asked nervously.

"Well, I just got dumped on my wedding day, but apart from that-"

"I'm sorry, Nate." Blair said, again. "And I know that no matter how many times I say it, it won't be enough, but I really, really am."

Nate sighed. "When you were talking about me needing some one quirky and lively…you were talking about-"

"Serena." Blair finished. "Yeah. I know you still have feelings for her, Nate. And I have more than a sneaking suspicion that she feels the same way."

Nate didn't respond, simply stared down at the floor.

"So, what are you going to do now?" Nate asked.

"I'm going to Boston." She finalized.

He raised an eyebrow. "You're going to find Chuck."

She nodded. "Yeah."

"This is like one of those twists that the audience expects, but doesn't see coming."

"I love you, Nate." Blair murmured. "I'm just not _in_ love with you, not like-"

"Chuck." He finished. "You're in love with Chuck." He said, as if trying out the phrase.

"I am." She said confidentially.

He let out a long, slow breath. "I hope you find him." He murmured.

She eyed him in surprise. "Did you really just say that?"

Nate laughed, almost as if he was in shock as well. "I think I did, actually."

She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him tightly into a hug. "Thank you, Nate."

She stood up from the couch and wiped a tear from her eye with her white glove covered hand. She gave him a small smile and a small wave, before turning and opening up the door to his dressing room. She was met face-to-face with Serena.

Blair let out a slight laugh before giving her one more hug, her clutch pressing against Serena's back. "Bye, S."

"See you, B." Serena replied softly before Blair made her way off down the hallway. She paused, and turned around. All she could see was the door to Nate's dressing room closing shut, and Serena van der Woodsen nowhere to be found.

She laughed to herself.

This was the way it was supposed to be, she knew it.

"Blair, where are you going? The wedding begins in fifteen minutes!" Eleanore Waldorf hissed, latching onto Blair's arm as she brushed past her.

"Not my wedding." Blair said, turning to face her mother.

"Blair, what are you talking about?" her mom asked, clearly frustrated.

Blair shook her head. "This isn't happening, Mom. I'm leaving for Boston."

"_Boston_?!" she exclaimed, her voice raising at least four octaves. People sitting in their piers all turned to face Eleanore, who smiled at them politely before turning to her daughter. "What the _hell_ is in Boston?" she hissed.

"Chuck Bass." Blair said, smiling coyly.

"Chuck Bass." Her mom repeated, and Blair nodded. "You're abandoning your wedding and Nate _Archibald_, to run away to Boston to be with Chuck Bass?"

Blair nodded. "Yeah, that's exactly what I'm doing." She replied, breaking out of her mother's grip. "So, just let me go." She said softly, before turning and walking out of the hotel and into the New York sunlight that was slowly getting clouded over.

She scooped her wedding gown up in her hands and hurried across the pavement to get to the sidewalk, waving her hands wildly for a taxi.

One pulled over almost instantly; clearly stunned by the wedding gown monstrosity she was wearing.

"Late for your wedding, Miss?" the cabbie asked, laughing.

"No." she said, shaking her head. "There is no wedding going on today. I just need to get to JFK as fast as possible."

-

**C**

**-**

Chuck eyed the girl in front of her, stunned. "Blair, what are you-?"

"Did you know there's a Beaker Boulevard here, too?" she asked, cutting him off and stepping into his apartment. "Because, I didn't know that. And my cab was already gone before I had the chance to realize that. So, I walked here. In the rain. In a wedding gown."

"Blair, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be Mrs. Nathaniel Archibald by now?" he asked.

Blair laughed, tilting her head back. "I just flew out to Boston in my wedding gown; do you really think that I would go through all of this trouble _just_ to tell you that I was married to Nate?"

"Well, no. But that still doesn't-"

She slugged him. "I didn't marry him, you idiot." She said, laughing. "I called off the wedding."

"Why would you do that?" Chuck asked, almost as if using that question to mask over the question "are you clinically insane?"

She reached into the black clutch in her hand and pulled out a wrinkled envelope, handing it to him. "Because of this."

Chuck recognized his handwriting instantly, and he knew exactly what the letter was. "Blair, I wrote this five_ years_ ago."

"And I just found it yesterday." Blair noted. "But, I've read it over fifty times since then."

Chuck eyed her confusingly. "Blair-"

"I love you, Chuck Bass." She cut him off once more. "And for some reason, it took me until yesterday to realize that, but I do." He opened his mouth to respond, but she beat him to the punch. "You've been there for me since I was sixteen, Chuck. And I didn't realize that. I lost my virginity to you, and my heart. And I know that sounds cheesy, cliché, and everything that's so easily not _Blair_, but it's true. It's _so_ true, Chuck. And I know that it's been five years, and for all I know, you could have a girl in the bedroom right as I speak, but I just wanted you to know-"

Chuck cut him off the only way he knew how, by crushing his lips up against hers, and she didn't dare object.

She dropped her clutch to the floor and slung her arms around his neck tightly, pressing herself against him and kissed him deeply. She could feel him smiling against her lips, and she smiled in return. He ran his hands through her hair and pressed his tongue pleadingly against her lips, and she opened her mouth without a second thought.

They broke apart a few moments later, his arms still firmly locked around her waist.

"I look like shit." Blair said, laughing and running her hand almost self consciously through her hair.

"You're beautiful, Blair." Chuck argued. "You know you are." He sighed, looking at her with wonder in his eyes. "You broke it off with Nate? Really?"

She nodded. "I know he was upset, but I think he'll be okay."

Chuck couldn't wipe the smile off of his lips, no matter how hard he tried. "God, I love you Blair."

Blair smiled widely, a grin appearing. "I was hoping you'd say that." She said before wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her lips against his once more.

And it was absolutely perfect.

-

**The End!**

**Wow, that was long…lol.**

**Anyways, I hope you guys liked it:)**

**-**

**R&R and please, no flames!**

**-**

**XO,**

**DC :)**


End file.
